Not a fan

Maybe you should be

Back in 2016, I bought a book called “Not A Fan” by Kyle Idleman. I’d read some of his other books and really enjoyed his perspective, I appreciated his message in this particular book.

In it, Idleman basically asks whether someone is a true follower of Jesus or just a “fan.” He suggests that many churches in America have gone from sanctuaries of worship where people come to be changed, to becoming like stadiums where “fans” go to watch, to cheer on others who are doing the work, and being entertained.

It’s a good book and makes a good point. I recommend it.

However, it also ignores the real-life benefits of fandom.

In the book “Fans Have More Friends,’’ authors Ben Valenta and David Sikorjak say studies show that fans who have favorite teams are twice as likely to be “very happy” compared with nonfans; are far more likely to feel known; and, in general, seem to live happier, more involved and active lives.

Being a fan acts as a social catalyst. Strangers become friends while watching games together or by attending concerts. Sharing your enthusiasm for something seems to overcome social, economic and even racial differences and creates bonds that otherwise would never have existed.

But does such connection last beyond the final horn or last encore? A 2021 study, “Does Sports Make People Happier, or Do Happy People Like More Sports,” published by the Journal of Sports Economics, found “a positive correlation between sports participation and reported life satisfaction.”

Arthur Brooks is a professor at Harvard University (among other things) who has made a specialty of researching happiness. He cites a 2017 study published by the American Psychological Institute that said “team identification makes life feel more meaningful by creating a sense of belonging.”

The nonprofit More in Common study on “Fans, Politics, and the Power of Sports” produced data that says sports fans are much better citizens. Compared to nonfans, fans are on average more likely to be registered to vote (92 percent vs. 75 percent), participate in local elections (64 percent vs. 35 percent), support democratic norms (73 percent vs. 53 percent), donate blood (29 percent vs. 12 percent), and donate to a place of worship (43 percent vs. 18 percent).

Looking at those studies, Brooks asks, “But friendship based on something as trivial as a shared identification with a sports team? Yes, according to no less an authority than Aristotle, who argued in his Nicomachean Ethics that deep friendship generally requires a shared activity motivated not by self-interest, but by a pure and innocent desire to enjoy the activity in communion. “Some men,” he wrote, “drink together, others gamble, others join in gymnastic exercises or hunting, others study philosophy together: in each case spending their days together in that which they like best of all things in life.” If Aristotle were alive today, I like to think he’d also include some men texting each other about shared spiritual concerns….”

Todd Rogers, another Harvard guy, has research previewed by Brooks where Rogers and co-author Audrey Feldman “conducted experiments on strangers who shared sports fandom but differed politically. They found that a common sports allegiance typically brings people together across ideological differences more effectively than shared race, religion, region of residence, or socioeconomic status,” Brooks said.

Ok, but what about those fans who riot after championships? The violence that too often breaks out after a big win? After the New York Knicks won the teams’ first NBA championship in 50-plus years, school buses were set on fire, several people were shot or stabbed, ten police officers were injured, and dozens of people were arrested. Brooks said in his studies, “we would call these instances empirical irregularities,” defined as a “deviation or anomaly in a pattern, process, or outcome that can be observed, measured, or verified through direct experience or experimentation — rather than being explained solely by theory or abstract reasoning (according to my quick Google search). In other words, these are the exceptions that get more attention rather than the rule.

More often, if you witness celebrations after a championship or interactions between people on their way out of concerts, you see a lack of political factions and religious division. It’s just people, watching their team or artist do something great, and causing people to interact and celebrate together and actually “like” each other.

It’s community.

I wonder what would happen if people who went to church – the people Idleman refers to as “fans” – actually became these kinds of fans. It’s not just wearing the t-shirt (plenty of Christians do that) or having bumper stickers on the car (again, I see that), but actively out there talking to each other, interacting with other people; people from other churches, finding what they have in common and overlooking differences in order to celebrate the commonalities.

I met a Black guy (I mention his race only because I’m white, an obvious potential barrier in a relationship) at a conference I attended who was from a city in another state, who it turned out we had very little in common from a social or even political perspective, but he was wearing a t-shirt that said, “If God is your father, you are my brother.” And we found that to be true, that our “sonship” overcame other differences.

Beyond that, the involvement that apparently goes along with being a fan - being registered to vote, voting, participating in local government, giving generously – are all things that Christians in any country should do, to the extent they can.

Actually, according to Worldmetrics, weekly churchgoers are 25% more likely to vote than those who attend monthly or less, with 64% of Christian voters saying they feel more accountable to their faith community when they vote, and 81% supporting political role that reflects Christian values (there is no definition on how these voters define “Christian values”). Christian voters are 18% more likely to volunteer for a political campaign than the general population, according to a 2023 Bipartisan Policy Center study.

And as for generosity, giving to religious organizations (congregations, denominations, missionary societies, and religious media) remains America’s largest recipient of charitable giving. Overall, about 10 million tithers in the US donate $50 billion yearly to church and non-profits, according to Nonprofits Source in a 2021 report.

That being said, the statistical difference in being a fan of sports and a fan of church is not that far off.

Where I do agree with Idleman is wanting to see fans’ hearts change. He challenges Christians to stop cheering for Jesus and get in the game—to pursue an intimate, fully-committed relationship with Jesus with everything they have. That’s the real line between “fans” and “believers.”

But the real lesson here may be something else: when people get involved in something outside themselves, they are happier, more actively engaged, better friends and neighbors and citizens. Psychology Today has had reams of articles on this, how what they call “collective effervescence” – people uniting in a common purpose – fosters a sense of unity. It’s been proven to calm nervous systems and strengthen bonds, reducing feelings of personal discrimination and feelings of isolation.

I’m not talking eternal destiny here. Certainly, I believe an active, seeking relationship with God is far healthier than going to a bar with a bunch of Bears’ fans and cheering on the team. (Although I can see how some might say the bar is more fun).

But I am in favor of people getting involved in something outside themselves, what Brooks called “a shared activity motivated not by self-interest, but by a pure and innocent desire to enjoy the activity in communion.” Anything that brings healthy interaction with others, creating a sense of belonging and reducing isolation, is a great antidote for one of the major problems in society today. In 2023, U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy declared loneliness and social isolation an epidemic, highlighting that it is far more than a mere emotional state — it poses significant health risks for individuals and society at large. Even before the COVID-19 pandemic, according to a Harvard University research paper, about half of American adults reported experiencing loneliness, and the pandemic further intensified social disconnection.

The best solution? Intentional social connection.

A good start might just be by becoming a fan.

Sleepless nights

 

We give up control when we sleep; so who is running things?

We can’t fly or see through walls or make ourselves invisible, but I was reading an article that suggested we all have at least one “superpower” – defined as a “rare, exceptional, or highly developed ability that sets them apart from the average person.”

If you were to ask my wife what my superpower is, she’d probably say it’s my ability to go to sleep.

It’s true, I guess. When I lie down and close my eyes, I am usually asleep in just a few minutes. In fact, I don’t like to watch TV while lying down – I have a hard time staying awake. But even if I’m not in a prone position, if I close my eyes for a few minutes, I can drift off.

My wife is envious. She has always hard a hard time sleeping, sometimes only a few hours a night. She would usually go to bed before me – I tend to write late at night – but when I went to bed, she was usually awake. Despite her best efforts at going to sleep, I’d always go to sleep before she did. Usually I’d wake up before her – she would eventually fall asleep for a few hours – and sometimes I’d go downstairs and see the living room furniture had all been rearranged. She’d do that in the middle of the night, because she couldn’t sleep and she’d think of a new look and, since she was awake … well, no time like the present, I guess.

There have been times in my life when I had trouble sleeping. Usually it was due to worry, or stress, or whatever you want to call it. Those are miserable times.

In the Book of Job, (7:4) it says, “When I lie down, I think ‘How long before I get up?’ The night drags on, and I toss til dawn.” My guess is most of us have experienced that, to some degree or another.

It’s hard, not being able to sleep. It’s hard enough to face life when you’re well-rested. But when you’re suffering from lack of sleep, problems tend to become all-consuming. We can blow them all out of proportion, thinking of all the things that can go wrong. One sleepless night is tough; two or three in a row and even the smartest, most resilient people you know can start to come apart.

Sleep deprivation is widely recognized as a form of torture. We know that during the course of a regular day, our cognitive abilities can start to slow down over time. The longer we go without sleep, the more it affects more than just our thinking. I read that after 24 hours without sleep, cognitive impairment is comparable to a blood alcohol level of .10 percent, beyond the legal limit for driving. Our comprehension abilities, our reaction time, our awareness of what’s around us is affected. We can even start to see things that aren’t there.

I know from friends who have chronic sleep issues that pain, combined with sleepless nights, can take over the way you think. Pain becomes the loudest voice in your head, that can drown out rational thought, make you doubt things you know to be true. Sleep deprivation only makes it worse.

Psalms 127:2 says “God grants sleep to those He loves.” King David, for all his many, mostly self-inflicted, troubles, wrote a good bit about sleep. In Psalm 3:5 he said, “I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me.” And in Psalms 4 he says, “I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety.”

I’m sure people who suffer through sleepless nights can read those verses and question whether God loves them. Why would there be this promise, and then give good people who suffer through no fault of their own so many sleepless nights?

But then there is the Apostle Paul, who writes about sleepless nights in 2 Corinthians 6, including lack of sleep in his list of hardships he endured. He later, in chapter 11, says, “I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep … face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches.”

And then I think of Jesus, the night before he would be betrayed by one of his closest followers. He didn’t sleep. His disciples did. He even chides them for not being able to stay awake with Him. But then, they didn’t know what was coming and Jesus did. We talk a lot about all that Jesus endured on that last day; in Catholic theology it’s referred to as the “passion of the Christ” (from the Latin pati, which simply means “to endure” or “to suffer.”). Rarely have I heard anyone focus on “lack of sleep” as part of that suffering.

Again, Job says, “When I think my bed will comfort me and my couch will ease my complaint, even then you frighten me with dreams and terrify me with visions.” (7:13-14)

I know people who could say – and do say – exactly what Job is saying.

Why do we sleep? I mean, I know it’s because bodies need time to rest and rejuvenate, even heal. But God could have made us so that we didn’t need sleep. Think about it; if you sleep eight hours a night, that’s one-third of your day. That means if you have a normal sleep pattern, you spend one-third of your entire life sleeping.

What happens when we sleep? Besides our bodies resting and all that. The world goes on without us. When we sleep, we surrender control. We check out for eight hours (more or less). We basically lose consciousness, at least as it relates to the things actually happening around us. All those things we think can’t happen without us – they’re still there in the morning.

And it’s not like other people are awake taking care of our lives while we sleep. For the most part, the people around us who live in the same time zones are sleeping when we sleep. And yet the whole world continues, as if it hardly realizes we’re not participating.

Whether we realize it or not, sleep is basically trusting God to keep everything running, under control, to make sure that – most of the time, anyway – we don’t wake up to a disaster that could have been avoided if only we’d been awake.

Once a day, God has us check out. We like to think we’re in control, but for those eight hours or so that we’re asleep, we’re not. It’s like every day, God sends us a message to remind us that we’re not Him, that he has – as the old song goes – ‘‘the whole world in His hands.’’

Psalms 121 says God “who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord watches over you— the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.”

In other words, it’s God telling us to rest easy. This remains His world. He is in control.

Sounds like a party

It's July 4, Independence Day in the United State, a day we celebrate freedom.  

A number of years ago, when my oldest son as a student at The Citadel, he somehow was awarded the opportunity to do an internship one summer with the British Parliament. He and another Citadel student were housed in an apartment within walking distance of the seat of Great Britain’s government, and assigned to work in the office of an MP (Member of Parliament).

As July 4 approached – which, rightfully so, is just another day in England - my son and his roommate decided to throw an Independence Day party. They had shirts that represented the flag of the United States, and invited anyone and everyone, American or not. I don’t know that they could find hamburgers and hotdogs, but I’m sure they bought as “American” food as they could, along with plenty of beer, and blasted American country music from their stereo.

It attracted quite a crowd, of even the British friends they knew and worked with, who were up for a party (in spite of the fact that it celebrated a major defeat of their country). My son came upon two people standing, staring at Big Ben, the famous clock tower that stands at the north end of Westminster Palace, and asked, “Are you Americans?” The couple was embarrassed that they were so obviously tourists, but they admitted they were indeed Americans. “We’re celebrating the Fourth of July,” my son said. “Come on over.” And they did.

As I was thinking about Independence Day, I couldn’t help but marvel that, at one time, tiny Great Britian – an entire country that is basically the size of one of our American states – ruled almost the entire world. The saying went that “the sun never sets on the British Empire,” because there were British colonies literally all around the world.

Just about all of those former British colonies eventually gained independence – Canada, Australia, India, Pakistan, Nigeria, Singapore, South Africa, just to name a few - and eventually no doubt the American colonies would have gained independence as well.

But how different would this country have been? Indeed, how different would the world have been without the example of a democratic republic and the idea of “government by the people” the American founders established? The idea that natural rights come first, not where your parents were born or what language you speak or the color of your skin (although that took some time), and that power flows from We the People. Not to mention the advances that took place in America because, I believe, there was freedom to try, to innovate, to risk at a level perhaps never before seen in any other country. And there was plenty of reward for success.

I came across part of a speech given by President Calvin Coolidge in 1926, the 100^th year of the founding of this country, that are worth repeating:

“If all men are created equal, that is final. If they are endowed with inalienable rights, that is final. If governments derive their just powers from the consent of the governed, that is final.

“No advance, no progress can be made beyond these propositions. If anyone wishes to deny their truth or their soundness, the only direction in which he can proceed historically is not forward, but backward toward the time when there was no equality, no rights of the individual, no rule of the people. Those who wish to proceed in that direction cannot lay claim to progress. They are reactionary.”

As I thought of my son on that July 4 all those years ago, boldly celebrating his American heritage in the heart of the very country that opposed what he and his roommate and friends were celebrating, I couldn’t help but think of a passage the Apostle Paul wrote in Philippians (3:20): “But our citizenship is in heaven, and we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ.”

Our citizenship is in heaven. Jesus spent a lot of time talking about the Kingdom of Heaven. And one of the confusing things is that there often does not appear to be much difference between the citizens of this (or any) country and those of the Kingdom of Heaven. Much like on most days that summer my son spent in London, if you never heard him talk there would be no reason to assume he wasn’t English (but as soon as he opened his mouth and that Southern drawl started, there would be no doubt he was not of that world). No one but God knows the true difference.

I am also a citizen of the United States of America, and proudly so. As a Christian, I am told throughout scripture to pray for where I live, to uphold the laws of this country (unless they contradict God’s Word), to pray for our leaders whether I voted for them or not, and work for the betterment of my neighbors, my community, my state (for what else can it mean to “love your neighbor as yourself”?)

At the same time, we are told to live as witnesses of our heavenly kingdom, striving to be known as Children of God. Paul, again in Philippians 2 says, “Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, ‘children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.’ Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky as you hold firmly to the word of life.”

In everything, we’re to point people to Jesus, to show how they too can become citizens of His Kingdom. As Peter wrote (1 Peter 3), “Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. “Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened.” But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect …”

Be prepared to give reason for the hope that you have … but with gentleness and respect.

What does this look like? Again, Peter – writing, remember, during the Roman Empire, while in Rome, under the rule of the evil Nero who would eventually order his death – said we are not to “live (our) earthly lives for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God. For you have spent enough time in the past doing what pagans choose to do—living in debauchery, lust, drunkenness, orgies, carousing and detestable idolatry. They are surprised that you do not join them in their reckless, wild living …”

America is a country founded on ideas, and anyone who buys into those ideas – “that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed” – can become an American, too.

Just as anyone who recognizes Jesus as Lord, that He took on the punishment for your sin, and through his life, death and resurrection, you can have eternal life as a citizen of God’s Kingdom. It doesn’t matter where you were born, where your parents were born, your language or skin color. All that matters is your heart.

There is a great old hymn called “One Day” that has been on my mind a lot lately. The chorus says,

“Living, He loved me.

Dying, He saved me.

Buried, He carried my sins far away.

Rising, He justified freely forever

One day He’s coming, oh Glorious Day.”

That’s it, simply put. We live in anticipation of that Glorious Day.”

And like my son, inviting all to come to his party to celebrate American independence from King George III in the very heart of England, you’re invited to come to celebrate God’s Kingdom, regardless of your earthly citizenship.

I promise, there’s going to be a party.

White hats, black hats

 

How much have I missed by seeing only the color of your hat?

In the old days of black and white cowboy movies and TV shows, you could always tell the good guys from the bad guys: the good guys wore white hats, the bad guys wore black.

That changed with color TV and movies, generally speaking. But still, it made me realize that from a very early age, I was taught to judge. It wasn’t always by the color of the hat. But you could watch a movie or a TV show and generally tell who the bad guy was by appearances – Darth Vadar all in black; Javier Bardem’s haircut as Anton Chiguth in “No Country for Old Men;” Alan Rickman’s urbane sneer as Hans Gruber in “Die Hard.” Sometimes the bad guys have stubble where they haven’t shaved, or are sweaty, or carry themselves with an arrogant demeanor. It doesn’t take long in a movie or TV show to figure out who the bad guy is.

Even our cartoons – Boris Badenov and Natasha Fatale from Rocky and Bullwinkle; Simon Bar Sinister from Underdog; the cat in Tom and Jerry; The Creeper, who was really Mr. Carswell the bank owner, in Scooby-Doo – it was never hard to know right away who was going to cause problems. Captain Hook, Scar, Jafar … I'm showing myk age here, but you know them.

So it’s no wonder that as adults, we often make snap judgements about people based on appearances. Sometimes we just decide we either like or don’t like someone with one look. Maybe it’s their clothes, or their hair, the way they carry themselves.

I suppose people have done this from the beginning of time, but I wonder if my generation – the TV generation – hasn’t been taught this in a way unlike any previous generation.

We don’t typically like to admit we judge people, but I’m not sure we can help it. It’s not always bad. Sometimes we meet someone and after just a few minutes, a brief conversation, we decide we like them. It’s my experience that single adults looking for dates do this all the time; there are even songs about “the look,’’ or eyes meeting across a crowded room, a first innocent touch. Sometimes one look is all it takes to establish a good connection.

Of course, sometimes one look is all it takes to decide to be wary of someone, to feel uneasy around them, even decide if we will trust them.

But it got me wondering about how I look at people.

I was reading the verse (Acts 7:48) that says, “the Most High does not live in houses made by men.” Indeed, it seems Christ lives within people. “Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple?” (1 Corinthians 3:16). In Ephesians, Paul writes, “Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him.” (Ephesians 3).

There are all sorts of verses of how, as Christians, Christ lives within us, a mystery that I admit is hard to comprehend exactly what it means.

Even more, we’re told all of us bear the image of God. Not that we are God, as some would say; we are a reflection, an image of God. In Genesis 1:26 God says, “Let us make man in our image, in our likeness.” That should count for something. Afterall, in this life we are not likely to physically see God, but we do see each other.

You want to see God? Look at the people in the pews around you on Sunday morning. John (1 John 4:12) said, “No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us.”

I have heard it said that the church is like looking through God’s family album. Each member is a picture of the God of the Universe. Each image is seeing God from a different angle, a different mood, a different moment. Here He is as a baby; here He is as an old man; here He is as a young woman who doesn’t understand how beautiful she is because she doesn’t realize she is a reflection of God; here He is as a young man who is trying to prove himself, not understanding his place in God yet. Our personalities reflect God’s personality - although ours have been corrupted by sin. Yet all our qualities reflect to some degree the nature of God.

You never know when someone may suddenly surprise you. My wife has a wonderful trait of finding something interesting in almost everyone she meets. I am trying to be more like that – even though I have years of self-centeredness to overcome.

Each of us comes across thousands, if not millions, of people in our lifetime. You never know who may be the one that astonishes us, teaches us, reveals something we’d never seen before. I wonder what I have missed in dismissing so many people I’ve come across in my life.

You know the story of Jacob and Esau? They were twin brothers who had a falling out, and Jacob ran away in fear. Finally, he came home, but was terrified by how his brother – whom he had wronged – might react. (This is the story where Jacob meets and wrestles with God, and sees Jacob’s ladder, in Genesis).

But Esau does welcome Jacob back. And Jacob says, in Genesis 33:10, “To see your face is like seeing the face of God, now that you have received me favorably.”

Jacob saw the glory of God in a human face.

How much have I missed by focusing only the color of the hat they’re wearing?