Inflationary sex

My best friend was getting married.
Now understand, this was something a bit surprising to both of us, seeing as how we were both in our 30s and neither of us had ever been married.
But my buddy - and that's what I'll call him for the sake of this story, "Buddy" - Buddy had found a girl he'd decided was "the one."
And of course, I had to know how he knew she was "the one."
"How,'' I asked, "did you decide it was time to get married?''
And Buddy said something to me that will sound callous, chauvinistic, cold, and just plain wrong on so many levels ...
But at the time, it made a lot of sense.
He said, "Well, I finally realized I was not going to 'date' every girl in the world. So I decided to pick the one I enjoyed 'dating' the most and stick with it."
Now, he didn't actually use the word "date." He used another word. But you get the idea.
Not the most romantic notion in the world, I realize.
And truth be told, Buddy was not really a guy who was out to "date" every woman in the world, or even really as many as he could. He was not a guy who counted scalps, or whatever euphemism you want to use. He wasn't a "ladies man" by any stretch of the imagination, although he certainly did all right and had dated - and by 'dated' this time I actually mean 'dated' - several really nice, wonderful young women.
But quite frankly, I think to a lot of guys out there, Buddy's rationale strikes a chord and in some sick, guy-only way, makes sense.
So this is for the guys out there.
Let's be honest: sex is everywhere. And it's very appealing.
Just about every movie and TV show has it as either a plot or at least a subplot.
As a result, we think sex is happening everywhere (except, perhaps, where we are). Certainly it seems to be happening a lot more than it used to.
And maybe it is.
But a lot of things happen more than they used to. I remember when I was a kid, it was a big deal to be a  millionaire. Back then, it meant something. Now, there are so many millionaires that, quite honestly, it's not as big a deal as it once was. Oh, don't get me wrong; it's still nice. I wish I was one. But being a millionaire isn't quite what it used to be.
Maybe  that's because so many more people have so much money, causing money to have lost some of its value.
And you know that's true. Call it inflation. Or the devaluing of the dollar.
Economies are based on the exchange rate of the dollar, and we like to keep the value of the dollar high. But there are disagreements over how to do that: do we save it, or do we need to spend it? Yet deep down we recognize that the more dollars that are out there in the market, changing hands, the less value the dollar has, even though some people say that's the best thing for the economy.
Do you see where I'm going?
Sex is like the dollar. (In fact, there are places where you can exchange dollars for sex, but that's another story).
Back in the old days, sex didn't seem to be quite so easy, so it maintained a certain value. Oh, we talked about it, and dreamed about it, and lied about it - just like we did when it came to how much money we made - but because getting it was so elusive, it really meant something.
Which is the way God meant it to be.
Think about all those books and movies and TV shows that picture people "hooking up,'' seeking and having sex with as many people as there are episodes in a season, making sex seem about as special as finding a penny on the sidewalk.
For all that activity, in the end what almost every one of those people want is a meaningful relationship with someone. They want something special with someone special that is shared only with the two of them (and I know you can find exceptions to this idea, but even those exceptions I'd argue are people who somewhere along the way lost the ability to have a real relationship with another person; we can argue about this one later, if you'd like).
What it means is that - to borrow a phrase - we have to learn the value of the dollar.
It's not easy, because so many people think they understand the value of the dollar. They'll do anything for a buck, while at the same time throwing money away on things they believe to be "necessities'' that really aren't; things our parents and grandparents and great-grandparents never even dreamed of and got along quite fine without.
Try getting someone to "save" today, when most of us live paycheck to paycheck, or even start our lives in debt, hoping we'll get caught up someday, down the road. Economists tell us that people in America just aren't saving the way we used to, and that's a major concern for the future of the economy.
And so the dollar is cheapened and loses its value. We can see what that has done to the country.
The same thing happens when relationships between people are cheapened, and sex is traded like a commodity.
If we saved money and treated it carefully and with respect, how much better would our economy be?
If we saved sex and treated it carefully - just decided today that we'd be monogamous for the rest of our lives - think of all the trouble, not to mention disease, that would end within a generation or two. We'd be so much healthier.
In the end - as so often happens - God turns out to be right.
Oh, and my friend Buddy?
He was ready to give up dating, and got married. Unfortunately, after a few years, his wife decided to start 'dating' again. So they split up.
As hurt as Buddy was by all of this, down deep, he still years for something special, some connection that takes place between only him and that special person that is his and his alone (just as he wants to belong to that someone alone).
It's not easy, trying to have values different from so many around us.
But then, we see what the easy way leads to.